The Adventures of the Reese's Pieces Gang

When Thomas started waking several times a night we also saw many other changes. He started screaming a lot. Anytime someone entered his "space" or touched him. He stopped looking at us, and he stopped talking. He screamed and pointed when he wanted something. The word I missed the most was mama. He stopped asking for me and saying my name. A couple other quirky things that were happening was that he would refuse to wear clothes, he screamed if I put new clothes on him without washing them first, he started to eat very few foods. I took Thomas in for his 2 year appointment at the doctor and expressed concern about his speech. Thomas would hardly sit still for the exam, was all over the office and was fighting me to put his clothes back on. It saddens my heart that the doctor just looked at me and said, "He has so many siblings that they are all just talking for him, he'll be fine." I told her that we didn't talk for him and he didn't talk for himself. I was brushed off and went home thinking well.... I guess he'll be ok. You have to realize that even though all these things were happening, Phil and I really didn't SEE them at the time. I was pregnant again and dealing with 4 children 5 and under. It wasn't until Philip joined us and started to develop normally when we realized how behind Thomas was. I'll tell you more about how the Lord revealed to us that Thomas was autistic tomorrow.

Today's tip: Talk to your children about autism. Most schools and churches today have an autistic child in them. 1 in 150 children is being diagnosed with Autism today. Our public school has less than 130 in the elementary and there are 2 with an Autism Diagnosis. Do some independent research about how autistic children typically behave and teach your children that these kid are fearfully and wonderfully made. Help them to see these children as needing Christ's love and their friendship and patience too! It is tough being a friend to a special needs child but it is needed. Our kids need other kids to not be afraid of them, to realize that they have trouble expressing their wants and desires, to play with them with patience and understanding when the autistic child doesn't make it through the entire game.

My favorite Autism book: Unraveling the Mystery of Autism and Pervasive Developmental Disorder by Karyn Seroussi. This is a great starter book for a family who has just been told their child has autism. It gave me great hope that my child could progress and learn, that I needed to do my own research and that my medical doctor might not have all the answers.

Thomas was born at 38 weeks old weighing in at 7 lb 8 oz and 20 inches long. He developed right on track as a baby. He clicked into a beautiful routine at 6 weeks and was sleeping through the night by 8 weeks old. He rolled over, sat, crawled, and walked all at normal times. His first word was ma, which of course was very exciting for me since all the other said da first! :-) Thomas was a fun, happy baby up until sometime between 14 & 16 months. The first change we saw was that he stopped sleeping at night. He woke screaming 4-8 times a night. This was s difficult time for us, he would scream for 2 hours sometime never seeming to be fully awake, yet he seemed to be in severe pain. Several times we almost took him to the hospital.

We have since learned that these sessions of screaming probably weren't the typical night terrors. They may have been this child having severe intestinal pain as a result of his inability to digest dairy and gluten. As a normal 1 yr old Thomas was having whole milk each day and was starting to have wheat and other gluten grains in cereal and bread. He had loose stools ALL The time. Yet, because we knew nothing of food allergies/insensitivities we followed the suggestion of the health officials and gave him all the "normal" foods. And for the next two years...... never slept.

If you are seeking natural healing for your autistic child. Investigate the GF/CF diet. One of my favorite websites for information is www.taca.now. If they are struggling with sleeping well, look into a good clean source for melatonin. I like Kirkman's formula (http://www.kirkmanlabs.com/). If I had known about melatonin then I would've tried it. Thomas uses it now or it is very difficult for him to get to sleep at night, especially during the winter when he doesn't have as much time to play outside because he is in school until 1:15 then therapy until 7:15 most nights.

How could you help a mom with and Autistic child? If she has 1 or more children chances are she is tired! Autism is emotionally and physically draining. Offer to go to her house and play with the children so she can take a nap for a little while.

My final challenge for you today is to ask you to consider praying for autistic families each day this month. Today pray for wisdom for these families that God would guide their thoughts and research as they seek to help their child with the challenges of autism.

This month if you watch the news you may find out that April is Autism Awareness month. Our family is blessed to have a wonderful almost 7 year old autistic boy. This month I will take some time to tell you about our autism journey, sharing many lessons that the Lord has taught us through this process. I will also share with you the many things we have learned that have been a huge help to Thomas. We have seen so much progress over the past almost 3 years since his diagnosis. If you have a friend or family member with Autism please feel free to share my blog address with them so that they might receive some encouragement through our story.

I have a friend who is also posting about Autism on her blog each day this month. I love how she is sharing and will probably follow a similar format. I hope you will be blessed by her thoughts, struggles, and lessons as well. http://highnotes.blogspot.com/

For today, I want to encourage you to see children through different eyes. Phil and I believe that a naughty child is one that needs to be trained up and biblically disciplined and discipled! Thomas changed a lot of that for us. Before he was diagnosed with Autism we thought we had failed as parents because he refused to listen, obey, look us in the eyes, and respond properly to his siblings. Anytime we saw a kid screaming in a store or being disobedient, what we thought we used to think.... wow.... that kid really needs a spanking. When Thomas was diagnosed with Autism we were relieved! There was a reason, besides sin, for his behavior and we needed to learn how to train him biblically but in a way that he could learn and understand. We prayed and thanked God for Thomas and asked forgiveness for all those other families we had judged.

Now when I go shopping I still see naughty children that need loving discipline but there are also many times I notice children on the Autism Spectrum, and can pray for that mom that she will have the strength to make it through her shopping that day! And that she will find hope in Christ, He has been our constant strength and power as we travel through the journey of Autism.

So I challenge you, when you see a parent struggling with a child in the store or a child who is 5 or 6 with a pacifier, or even one that seems to be screaming uncontrollably and flapping their hands, rolling their eyes, etc.... that child may be autistic and the mother ready to cry. Pray for that mom and pray for that child and reach out in a loving way if you have the courage. I know that when people would say things to me like, "Oh let me get that for you," while Thomas was screaming and I was trying to haul him back into the cart while trying to grab the katsup. I could smile through the tears and say, "thank you, my son has autism and struggles with shopping sometimes." Then usually I'd quickly finish my shopping dreading the check out and get to the van and cry!

Now Thomas enjoys shopping even though he is still socially not appropriate and talks to everyone or yells things at the top of his lungs as we go through the store, it isn't something I dread. I can now use shopping as a way to talk with him about what he is seeing since autistic kids really don't notice things around them like typical kids. It makes me smile when Thomas says "Look mommy, there are grapes, can I have the grapes please?" This from a child who didn't talk until he was 4 1/2.

If you really want to reach out to a family with Autism in your church offer to sit with that child every Sunday in Sunday school or Junior church. Ask the parents how to do this the most effectively and minister to that child each week. About 2 years ago we had a family in our church who had a special needs son who was 20. She saw me struggling, missing many services because Thomas just couldn't handle being in a classroom with other kids . She volunteered to be with Thomas each Sunday school and was willing to show him tough love while sometimes being hit and bit by Thomas. Ok.... before you are totally appalled I'll talk more about hitting, biting, kicking and other aggressive behaviors and autism in another post. My point is, I was able to go to Sunday School again and be blessed by the teaching and preaching of the Word.

I'll look forward to sharing more each day. I hope you will be blessed by my rambling as I walk down our Autism Memory Lane and share about Thomas's current abilities.